If you don't know that these songs are mall sung by the wonderful Demi Lovato then I have nothing to say to you.
Hey guys happy Thursday! So today's post is going to be long, sorry not sorry, and if you don't like it then get off this blog! Ok so if the song don't indicate my mood right now then let me tell you how I'm feeling! So today my mom got the CHILD support, and yes it is for Laura, but my sister doesn't care if we all share it. My mom NEVER gives to my sister she always uses it for herself! So she gets us bfast this morning and I have been craving apples something crazy, so I find the least expensive ones, $1.00 a pound; I got four. I wasn't going to eat them all in one sitting I just got them because I was very hungry. She gets mad and was like that is all you get today. I am not buying any more fruit for you ever again. So I get a little upset and have a good cry. I am sick and tired of her wanting me to fail. She is my mother and as a mother they are supposed to support you no matter what you want to do. She may not like it, but she should at least encourage you to succeed. My mom doesn't, she actually encourages me to give up being vegan. She even told my sister she is going to try to get me to eat more meat. Can you frikin believe that?! What the mess right?! So on the way to TC I listen to those three songs. Skyscraper was to get me to stop crying and it worked, Let It Go (the Demi version) was to get me to just breathe and relax, and Warrior was to remind me that she can't hurt me anymore. She doesn't have power over me anymore and she never will again.
You know how we all eventually turn out like our mothers? Well I am determined to do everything I can NOT to turn out like her. I don't want to be a bully. That is what she is; just a bully. I am not going to make my kids feel worthless and try to stop them from living their dreams. My kids are not going to be afraid of me.
So this summer I am staying with my dad and I plan on getting a job there asap. Then once the summer is over I'll be coming back to Avery to pack up my stuff and I will NEVER come back to her. I will come back to visit only my sister and my brother and friends, but not her. I know I am saying this out of anger and I know in the end I will come back to see her, but I need to be far away for now because if I don't get away soon I am going to explode.
Thanks for reading and I will leave ya'll with some lyrics from those songs.
Skyscraper:
Do you have to make me feel like
There's nothing left of me
You can take everything I have
You can break everything I am
Like I'm made of glass
Like I'm made of paper
Go on and try to tear me down
I will be rising from the ground
Like a skyscraper
Let It Go:
Let it go, let it go
Can't hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go
Turn my back and slam the door
Warrior:
You can save your apologies you're nothing but a liar
I've got shame, I've got scars that I will never show
I'm a survivor, in more ways than you know
Cuz now I'm a warrior
I've got thicker skin
I'm a warrior
I'm stronger than I've ever been
And my armor, is made of steel you can't get in
I'm a warrior
And you can never hurt me again
There's a part of me I can't get back
A little girl grew up too fast
All it took was once I'll never be the same
So I'm taking back my life today
Nothing left that you can say
Cuz you were never gonna take the blame anyway
