Ok, so about the last time!

So last post I was really depressed and pretty much a wreck! Well, I have recovered a little! I am trying to get out of this hole and I am slowly climbing up and out! I am still feeling like a failure at some points of the day, but I feel like I am figuring things out!

Today I woke up early, Zumba'd my ass off, had a wonderful breakfast, and now here I am feeling great! I feel refreshed and ready to take on the world!

Ok, yesterday I had an eye appointment to get contacts and I could get them in at all! So today I am going back and bringing an expert my bff! She will help me until I can do this on my own!

Hey gotta run to lunch with the fam so I will post an extension later!

Ciao

I guess I spoke too soon!

Yep i guess I did! You know how I said that the depression has gone away? well here I m balling my eye out because I feel like a failure! How come that for once in my life I can't have more than 1 supporter? I know all the support I need is Jesus and trust me I have it all the time, but for once I want ot achieve something and have someone clap for me or something like that! I support everyone I can and not one person returns it! I guess I am just being over dramatic! Whatever, I gotta go. If you don't hear from me for a while it is because I am either just done with everything or I am busy! I will try to make time! See that's the problem with me, I make time for everyone and everything and no one returns that to me! I need to make time for myself and be me instead of trying to please everyone! Is it too much to ask for support?

bye

Falling

Ok this song is by Tyler Ward featuring Alex G.  and I absolutely love it! It makes me sway back and forth and it also makes me realize I really don't like being single! I know this is random, but I just want a boyfriend again! Yes being single has given me new perspective on who I am! I know this time I will not date anyone who is not saved by Jesus! He needs to be a good person, not someone who is after the one and only thing mostly every guy is after! I want someone who is going to make me want to fall in love with him! Someone who I can dance with, and laugh with, and just be myself with. I know one day I will find the guy for me and that day will be a very good day! I just hope I don't screw it up like I have the last three times with the last three guys. I know now that God did not want me with those guys, and I know y heart that He will put the right guy in my life at the right moment! I am happy being single for now, but I want to find love! Or what I really want is for love to find me! To completely smack me in the face and make me feel like I am falling! If you haven't I recommend listening to this song! It is so sweet! I love it!  Anyways I just had to get that off my chest! Thanks for reading! See ya!

Ciao!

P.S. If you do listen to the song make sure to type full song b/c the video is not the full song!

The truth shall set you free!

Ok hey everybody! I don't have a song! Or anything like that! I just realized how much crap I deal with and then I was humbled at how much I have to be thankful for! I am having a great day! I am moving on in my life and I am excited to see what the future holds! Soon my family and I will be embarking on a vacation to Florida! We will e driving all the way to Disney World! I love it! I am excited for that too! Tomorrow I am going to go get my ID, and apply for jobs!
Ok so about the crap load I deal with! Well I was just feeling avoided by everyone! Maybe it's b/c everyone hates my attitude, but I am here to say SO WHAT! I am not being rude, just honest! Ok if you don't like it then go away!  (Sorry about that to the people in my life that never avoid me, I was not directing this at you!)
Ok I was feeling so content with myself last night and I still do! I love my figure, my family, my friends, and my life! I will change a few things about the first one, but it can only go up from here! I am happy with where I am in my life right now! SO very happy that I have Jesus as crutch!!! He lets me lean on Him when I need to and He supports me and helps me get through everything; and for that I am eternally grateful!

I have great news!  I FINALLY got accepted to Texarkana College!!!!!!!!!!!!! I did a little happy dance and screamed a lot! I feel so accomplished! Like if you had asked me 5 years ago if I knew I would be right here almost graduated I probably would have said I don't think so! I am happy, like the depression is going away more and more! I don't have suicidal thoughts too much anymore, and I am discovering who I am!
And to those who belittled my dreams to become a singer/songwriter  guess what? I AM GOING TO PROVE YOU WRONG! Everyone tells me that my dreams will be a flop and I will have no money to fall back on! Well guess what? I don't want to fall back on anything! I don't want to chase another dream! I want to go through the whole experience and if I don't make it then I don't want to leave this dream alone b/c it's not practical to some people! I like to take risks and I am going to with my music!




Anyways just an update on my life! Thanks for reading!
Until next time remember:

I am very awesome!

I am going to do it b/c I have dreamed it!

this is so me when people are like this!

no I did not get a tat! yet! and hey just remember today is the day that we remember who died for our freedom! They made the ultimate sacrifice, their lives, so that we can be here right now! If they didn't you may not be reading this and I may not be typing this! So to all those fallen soldiers: THANKS!!!!! And to the families left behind I send my condolences and thank you for having such an amazing person in your family!
Ciao!

Last Day!

Hello e'ryboday!!!!!
Ok no that is not a song name!!!!
But, guess what?
Today was my last day of high school!!! I do not have to go back there for classes or learning ever again!!! I graduate June 7th, and then I'm outie!!! My summer officially started 2 hours and 40 minutes ago!!! Warrior and I screamed YEAH YEAAAAAAYY and all that jazz on the way out the door!!! We were jumpin around and whatnot!!! I was so happy! ALSO!!! I made an 80 on my final in Anatomy and a 99 on my final in MATH!!!  I know right? I couldn't believe my ears when Ms. Blackstone told me that! I jumped up and down and did the happy dance!!!!
14 years ago I entered school for the first time! I was four years old and I was having the time of my life in Pre-K! I have been to 22 schools since then and everyone I have left a mark and they have changed who I am! However, no one school, other than De Kalb High, has had the greatest impact on me! I have made friends and lost friends here and I have so many memories. I truly can call De Kalb my home! I love it here! It is quaint and I hope to live here for as long as possible!
It's been a long 14 years building up to this, but I wouldn't trade it for the world! I have experienced so much and I am grateful for that! I have learned valuable skills and lessons that I will use in my life! I am so happy that I have spent these years in school and I may say that I hated it, but in the end I am nostalgic. It still has not quite set in yet, but once it does I may cry. I just wanted to say that everyone of you needs to cherish every second! You never know! You can literally blink and time will fly faster than a jet! I'm tellin it is like I blinked and BOOM I was already a freshman in high school, then BAM I blinked again and I'm a senior, and now I am about to be a graduate! Good times! Don't waste your time though, because you will NEVER get it back!


Well that is it for now! I will post more often now that I have all this free time! 
See ya'll on the flippity flop!

 

I will post more pics later but this should suffice for awhile! 

I think I am going to try something different for my goodbye!

 

 

 

 

PEACE OUT SUCKAAAAAAAAS!

 

 

That's Who I Am

this is by Jessica Andrews! i love this song and it has been ingrained in my system ever since i was little!
Ok so I haven't been blogging a lot lately, but I have good reason!
I've been busy!



I have had life changes happen in the past few days and a lot has happened! I went on the Senior Trip this past Friday and it ROCKED! we went to Six Flags, Fogo De Chao, and the Rangers game!!!
 ALL FUN!

Ok earlier tonight my bff (Warrior) asked me my what my college major would be and i said music of course and then she said it would be a flop!
 well i'm here to say : I DON"T CARE!!! I wanna do what I wanna do! so that is that!
i will study liberal arts and have myself a good time!

omg the girl i thought that was my best friend just played like a fiddle! She told her ex to ask me out like a joke and pretend to like me! and then when I finally wrap my head around the idea of someone liking me again then she reveals the little secret! i don't know who to trust anymore! HOW COULD SHE DO THIS!!!!!????
well let me tell you something i am not a fool and now i know when i am being played! i should've seen the signs really!!! but whatever! if people want to treat me like a joke i will leave them like it's funny!
i will post more later, but until then ciao!!!

Here's to NEVER growing up!

Ok this song is by Avril Lavigne and it is my new anthem and a new definition of me!   I am changing myself!! and intervention if you think about it!
ok so for a about 5 years now I have dealt with depression and it's been hard! The main reason I feel like this is because I am constantly criticized by someone in my life! I won't say who but those around me know who it is!
anyways in the past few minutes I was crying form another dig at me from this person and I realized I can NOT do this anymore!!!! I am not going to cry b/c of this person's words anymore!
I am not a wasted space or a lumberjack or the stupidest person on the planet or anything else this person calls me! I am original and no one will ever be just like me!
I am now going to be called Maggs! I used to go by that at my old school and no one treated me lke a pushover so I am no longer going to smile and take it I am going to voice my opinions and if people don't care for them then SO WHAT! they can kiss my ASS!! yes I cussed!! sue me! see the new me is kickin ass and takin names!   I feel so happy and free of this big weight that was on my shoulders and it is gone! I am never going to be the same ever AGAIN!  I am a FIREWORK!! and I am not going to be treated and used like I was before!   GOODBYE OLD ME AND HELLO NEW ME!!!
all this person will ever be is: a LIAR, and pathetic, and ALONE IN LIFE, and MEAN!
so here's to the new me!!! may she be happy in every endeavor she partakes in from now on!!!!
I will never change who I really am except for the part about me being a pushover and taking crap form this person! I feel so much better now!!!! like Warrior I was also looking at pictures I have saved on my computer and I was just so happy that the past 4 years have been spent with one person! My best friend: WARRIOR!!! www.sorry4partyrocking2012.blogspot.com  you should check that out!!! it's amazing!!!!!

this girl has been there through thick and thin and she will always be there we may fight and have disagreements, but I love her like family and that is what she is to me!!! thanks Warrior for everything you will never know just how much you mean to me!
so everyone out there: Here's to NEVER growing up! I wanna stay in my youth and I know I will as long as I have Jesus by my side! I will always have a young heart and a wise mind! 


so till' next time everyone!



ciao! <3

i found out and....

Felt Good On My Lips by Tim  McGraw was the song's name and who it was by! I can't believe I forgot that!
well warrior and I kinda simultaneously apologized at the same time! so everything's totally copesetic!  i'm in a good mood and have put project pz in motion, I am now calling it Project ~L&M~

it will be awesome!
so this is just a quick update and a quick shout out  to all of you fellow bloggers out there: FOLLOW ME!!!!    what do you think of theses new pics I took! I have an obsession with topknots again and vests! please leave your comments in the section below and as always: CIAO!!!!